Care (another one of those one-shots)

Care

//** the first one I thought of, this time while on a long boring jeepney ride, while listening to my MP3*//

He found that he could not concentrate that day. He had gone through a lot of pictorials before this, but he still feels so edgy. He could not have missed anything, did he? He went to an interview, that's a check. He then went to a solo TV guesting and the way he sees it, he did a great job at that since the director loved the outcome of the show. Now, he is up for a pictorial with his group but he feels anxious. It is like his nerves are stretched on its end as though he wants to worry about something but he doesn't know what, or for who.

Oh Well, he thought to himself. Since he needs to to nail the pictorial that day, he brushed these anxious thoughts aside and pushed the unexplained nervousness to the back of his mind. He had to impress his manager to make up for what he did the other day. Apparently, he went clubbing one night and missed a schedule for a product he was endorsing.

"WHAT IS WRONG HERE!?"the director shouted throughout the room."Hey Jin! You need to look cool and drool-worthy. You should be an expert at this."

This now bothered him.If it shows in his face that he is not himself, then he definitely is not himself.

What happened? What made him this troubled? His thoughts must have been plastered all over his face, because his friend Koki came up to him.

"YO! Jin. Look at you man. Jin Akanishi failing a shoot. It is so not like you." Koki, who was sporting an army haircut but with a brownish-blonde hue, tapped Jin on the shoulders.

"Huh? Me? miss a picture shot? I'm probably just tired dude." Jin tried to retort.

"Pfft. Don't give me that crap. I know you. I know you better than you know yourself." Koki countered with a smirk.

"Hah! Don't make me laugh. I'm just tired." Jin said, though he wanted to hear what his friend had to say.

"Blah! Blah! Blah!  Its all over your face. You must be worried because the bright, bubbly and funny fan of yours fell sick. You probably miss her since she usually shows up on one or two of your schedules, cheering for you." Koki informed Jin.

"Who are you talking about? I do not worry for just a mere fan"

"More like a stalker. Haha. No offense Jin but I see her around too often and don't tell me you have no idea who I am talking about. She is your favorite fan."

"I don't play favorites and I certainly don't get where this conversation is leading."

"You can play dumb now, but its been the talk of the staff today. That bubbly girl is ill and had them worried. Apparently she is so weak, she can't even get up from bed. Knowing her, she won't be drinking her medicine because she is hard-headed by nature. Oh! poor girl" Koki ended his statement with a dramatic sigh.

At this point, Jin had a vague recollection of stepping inside his dressing room and catching a few chitchats about an adorable lass being sick. From what he can remember he did fell uncomfortable after hearing that news but this could not be the reason for his anxiousness, so he scoffed "Serves her right for being clingy."

"See! So you do know who I am talking about. Don't you miss it? Her tingling laugh? Her sunny smile? Everyone likes her you know and that includes you. (Even though you don't seem to know it). Shes my friend too you know, so I must pay her a visit. What do you think?" Koki playfully suggested.

Jin suddenly shouted " Hey! She is my fan not yours. And by the way, I don't care!" With this, Jin walked out of the room leaving Koki with a knowing grin.

***

"What the hell am I doing here?" Jin muttered to himself as he was standing in front of an apartment building. He has never been inside the building but he knows exactly who lives there. He has been on the area of course because he dated one of the girl two blocks from here. He could not understand himself though. After denying favoritism over his fans and after blatantly announcing he didn't care, he took his car and zoomed over the city roads. Because he is confused, he blamed those nervous energy on the coffee he drank earlier that day.

Jin chucked to himself lightly, "I must be crazy. After beating a red light, almost hitting a turtle-moving car in front of me and inwardly cursing an old man crossing for being slow, I am still denying that I wanted to be here. Well dang! I am even arguing with myself now."

After pacing back and forth in front of his car, he noticed a few girls gathered around him with curiosity on their faces and doubt on the others. One even whispered to her friend " Is that Jin Akanishi? That wouldn't be right, would it? I mean why would he be here?"

Upon hearing this, Jin rushed to the apartment. He wouldn't want to attract to much attention right? Having no choice, he told himself that what he is doing is merely paying his fan a visit and that it is sometimes necessary for an artist. All the while though, he is also telling himself that he must be crazy for doing this.

Jin took a flight of steps then  headed to an elevator. He pressed the number 3 confidently as if he had pressed that a lot of times before. Seeming so sure of his destination, he waited inside the elevator alone. His artist side won the inner battle waging on his head. The "self argument" ended with the artist side thinking that an artist has to take care of his fans. He was not there because of some other reasons, like missing her laugh OK?

The elevator halted, and Jin stepped out to a hallway then walked to the 2nd door to the right. He hesitated a bit, then decided to knock. But right before his knuckles hit the white door, it flew open almost hitting his nose. A huge "Oh!" from a girl greeted him.

"Yo!" Jin muttered, raising his right palm in greeting while the other was tucked into his jeans pocket.

A longer "Ooooh!" was a response from the girl, who scanned and looked at Jin from head to toe. It was her first time seeing this person and she already thought he looked cool. He was wearing his hair down and is wearing cool shades, a V-neck shirt under a black hoodie jacket, loose pants and high-cut leather boots. He looked like he stepped out from a magazine endorsing "cool summer street looks"

Before Jin could react and ask what the girl is doing, he was pulled inside the room and heard the longest babble from the girl who opened the door.

"Just leave your shoes in the threshold over there and here wear these slippers," the girl said while pointing at a shoe threshold using one hand and handing him a pair of slippers on the other. "You really came right on time you know, since I really need to to go out and be at the university. You know, school stuff" she made a blank face and a casual wave of her hands.

"I received a call and we need to do further rehearsals on this performance we are doing. We are having major changes they said, this is for our grade, they said. This is for our future, they said" the girl continued to mutter while moving around the house, grabbing stuff like her bag, her shoes, her jacket, her hair tie.

"I was about to go out and tell the neighbor that I will be out later but then there you were"

Jin was about to ask who she is and was about to express the idea that he might have knocked the wrong door, when again the girl continued to talk.

"Don't give me that blank look, like you had in front of the door earlier." she said with a demand when she saw his face."My name is Michelle, I am the classmate, dance buddy, friend, sister and currently the nurse of the girl right there" she introduced then pointed at a while door on the right.

Jin watched the girl closely this time. She is definitely a friend. She is just as bubbly, hyperactive, pretty, not the girly girl type who wears skimpy clothes and stylish wardrobes to attract attention. Rather a girl who wears what she is comfortable with like a very plain T shirt but still looks sexy. Ahem I am describing the friend here okay? not somebody else he thought to himself.

"You may not know me but the moment I realized who you were, I instantly knew why you're here. I mean that friend of mine talks about you nonstop. Your face is almost everywhere on her computer among other idols. So you must be here on the account that she is sick. That's so sweet of you to drop by. I really need your help" Michelle continued to talk while packing extra tees and towels to her bag. All the while Jin was still standing near the doorway, almost dizzy with all of Michelle's moving around.

"As I've mentioned, my friend is sick and I need to go out. So you can look out for her. I already forced her to drink her meds- that hard-headed girl- so you do not have a problem anymore OK?"  she walked towards Jin then stopped when she was only an inch close with her face looking up to his.

"So that's it?" Jin raised his voice in a question. "You are leaving this house to someone you do not even know?" somehow this bothered him. This bothered him - a lot. "Do you always do this? Let anyone enter then leave them inside?"

Michelle snickered with her face so playful, it added to Jin's irritation. "That's okay, dude. Don't worry. I heard you are a good man. Well that girl is right on a lot of stuff like the fact that you are handsome, cool, hard-headed and short tempered. So the part about the good guy must be true too." With a wide grin on her face she handed him the keys to the apartment and pushed it on his chest.

"And now she's giving me the keys!" incredulous, Jin made a loud sigh and rolled his eyes upward.

"Yes that is correct! So take care of my buddy. I'm going out. See ya!"

"-Oh you're cool really and I heard you dance so you may want to drop by our studio and jam with us. eh?" She winked and then slammed the door closed.

Before Jin could breath a sigh of relief the door opened and in came Michelle's head "Oh and by the way, if that girl becomes delirious as she always is even if she is awake, or if she is uncomfortable or anything, just pop that silver CD on her player and she calms down. Please remember that!" then, with a dramatic whisper, as if she is retelling a ghost story, she added " She's wild like that!"

Michelle closed the door again and laughed secretly with herself. She intended to scare the hot guy and wanted to create an impression. It was partly his fault this incident happened in the first place...


*****

Jin was able to sigh with relief. "What a weird friend!" Jin moved to place the keys on the wall where all keys are kept. Then he looked at the room for the first time (he didn't have time earlier because of Mitch). The place was decent. It had two rooms and one smaller room which probably is somewhat becoming a their storage room. It had a medium-sized kitchen and they also have a living room complete with sofas and mini table. Cool enough, the living room faces a glass wall/window which overlooks the city outside.

Feeling that he needs to get this over and done with, he opened the sliding door of a room marked with three colorful letters- MAE.

His gaze roamed around the entirety of the small room. It had a decent-sized bed with a small side table and not far from it, is another table/drawer that housed a number of books and a CD player.

On the bed, is a girl with her hair splayed all over her white pillows and hugging another white pillow. Jin did not notice that he was actually holding his breath while watching the girl's features. Her head had drops of perspiration on it, her eyes were closed but her long lashes are still visible. Her full lips are slightly parted and although quite pale in comparison to its usual color, Jin had to urge himself to tear his gaze away from it.

He now understood. He now accepts it. The reason why he was on edge the whole day, the reason why he can't concentrate and the reason why he sped hi car in this direction. He wanted to see this girl. Not as a fan but as the girl he wanted to protect and spend time with.

Jin felt calm, he felt that everything is coming to place. He grabbed a chair and sat beside the bed. He took Mae's hand and just held it in his. Koki was right, he does miss her and her tingling laugh.

Mae stirred which had Jin watching her closely. But Mae just shifted her head on a more comfortable position and muttered ".. hate the rain.." Still holding Mae's hand, Jin proceeded to touch Mae's face, and tucked some of her hair that covered her face.

While doing this, Jin realized now why this girl fell ill.  He overheard that some of his fans still waited for him the other day even with the heavy rain. He purposely missed the product endorsement due to his hangover. This girl must have waited and soaked herself silly. Without a doubt, she was still from one of her dance practices when it happened.

"Baka!" he said with a smirk." Why do you always do this? " he moved his face closer to Mae's. "Look what happened, you are so weak and now I am so worried" He touched his nose at the tip of Mae's nose and smiled

He was about to plant a kiss on Mae's cheek when she suddenly stirred and move her head. Her eyes were still closed but now her forehead is creased with frown and she looks like she is having a hard time breathing.

Jin panicked and tried to calm Mae down by running his hands up and down her arms. To now avail though, because the girl looks like she's having a nightmare of a lifetime. He cupped her face and ran his thumbs on her cheeks and muttered "Sssh I'm here" but still did not calm Mae down.

He then remembered what Michelle told him and stood up.Reluctantly he let go of the girl and went to the CD player. He popped the only silver CD beside it, then played the only music it contains.


The very warm melody of the intro waffled through the air of the small room. The tune is very familiar to him as if it is part of his own bloodstream. The music somehow made him calm down and forget his panic.

The effect of this music to Mae though was quite surprising because she slowly stopped moving and evened her breathing. The frown on her face was still there by the first few lines of the song, but even those hard lines on her forehead were gone and was replaced with a serene look coupled with a hint of a smile on her lips, after the stanza.

Jin felt relieved, and let out a calming breath.This time he recognized the song. It was a song that was on his heart for some time before it found its way to a music sheet. He recognized the voice as his own and remembered the time he went to the studio to record it. He can visualize the times he performed it live on stage with nervousness and fear that the people will not like it.

He always thought the song was special and always said to himself that though he may have a very common voice he certainly hopes he touches the listeners with his song. He was full of dreams that this song does not just reach their ears but straight through their hearts.

With what he saw, what he has witnessed, Mae's reaction to that special song he made, he special song HE himself sang, this made his heart real. It throbbed and warmed to the girl in front of him. He no longer see a fan, he now sees a person as special as the song still playing in the air.

With a flick of a remote and a press of a button, her turned off the music and went back to the bedside. This time he held Mae's hand, kissed it then stared at the now beautiful face. He then continued the song he just turned off. This time, he sang it in his own voice. He sang it with all the feelings he wanted to convey.

Itsu datte bokura kitto dare datte
Kanashimi ya yowasa ikutsumo hiki tsurete
Taore kakatatte fumi dasu chikara wo
Kitto soko niwa naita bun no egao ga matteru

This time, he CAN'T deny, even to himself that he DOES CARE.

and then imagine this was how he sang it ♥_♥: please listen to it please please hehe

cr: KatTunfanYuki @yt

/* I wondered how Mae reacts when she wakes up but it ended with wondering, its tiring to imagine sometimes :D */